Guess what I learned about myself (at the age of 39) this last month? I'm an extrovert. I can hardly believe it. You see, as soon as I learned the definitions of introvert and extrovert way back when, somewhere in late elementary school, I pegged myself squarely as an introvert. Why? A couple reasons. I liked to read books by the schoolhouse door during recess instead of playing on the black tire jungle gym with the other girls. In fact, I preferred books to any social interaction-- and I was academic and everybody knows nerds are introverts. And I wore glasses....big ones... But now that I think about it as a rational adult, I can factor in some other issues---such as 6th grade girls are mean and have secrets, especially to girls who wear cokebottle glasses and sometimes use big words, while characters in books are rarely mean to the reader who is always privy to their deepest thoughts and they never leave you out, nor comment on your personal attire. Plus the tire jungle gym smelled like rotten rubber. I am sensitive to smells.
Early this April, I took yet another personality quiz which indicated that I was an extrovert....an occurance that has puzzled my strong introvert identity my whole life. Honestly, I've spent a lot of time over the years trying to figure out why an introvert like myself had so many extroverted tendencies. Was I a "bivert?" (You are supposed to laugh here.)
Anyway, after taking the aforementioned quiz, and then reflecting on my forced time alone in a hospital room (with a sleeping drugged out child granted) for six days, in which I clung to facebook messages like an addict, I realized that I love interacting with people! It really does energize me. Could I really be the opposite of what I've always thought I was? Like the lens that the eyedoctor flips over your eyes in an eye exam, suddenly so many things become clear....why being a stay at home mom is an emotional challenge for me and why it's getting harder as my house empties out (during the schoolday) instead of easier....why I get depressed when I'm not in Bible study with other women even when I am still studying the Bible privately.... why I LOVE reading and writing blogs even though I've never enjoyed private journaling.... why I MUST have a book to read if I do have to be alone even for very short timespans... All these things suddenly make sense, that never made sense to me before.
I love my new identity. I love that I just realized this. I love blogging, and that's OK because God made me to love it and it's not just that I don't want to do the laundry...or sweep the mudroom AGAIN...or clean out under the kitchen sink... Although that is true too.
I'm curious....what do you consider yourself...and introvert or an extrovert? And are you SURE?
4 comments:
I'm not surprised you're an extrovert! :)
I always thought the opposite. That I was a full on extrovert. I was a cheerleader always needed to talk to friends on the phone, be with people, which is still true, but I like one on one better. Also, I don't do well with crowds. For a while I thought it was change of life issues but it is who I am and I am growing to understand myself so much more. I am glad I am not alone! :)
I'm not surprised either! Also thank you for the blast from the past with the tire jungle gym reference- I could smell that nasty rubber smell the second you mentioned it. Miss you!
I'm so glad you love to blog, Suzanne! Your humor has been medicine to my soul more times than I can count. (I remember reading about your riding the merry-go-round with Lily and how you felt afterward. I was laughing so hard I was crying!) Praise the Lord Lily is o.k. - we are so thankful for how God protected her. Thanks for sharing the sweet photos of her in the hospital bed - just priceless. And, I love her new hairdo! It's so very, very cute!
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