A Very Scary Fairytale

Halloween is just around the corner. It's a holiday I prefer to ignore. I ignore all the evil, creepy, occultish decorations. I ignore the world's fascination with all that is dark. You can't even find anything to watch on tv at this time of the year, because it's all ghoulish....and I've made a couple of vows in my life: one...never to set foot in the CVS on Century Avenue and E again, and the other is never ever ever let shows or music that glorify the dark side play in my house. I have theories about that. BUT, I'm about to make an exception with the following post. Although this true tale took place in our kitchen a couple of months ago, it seems that now is the perfect time to tell you this frightening story, but take heed, the following images may be disturbing. You might have bad dreams....

Once upon a time....


...there was a sweet little princess (you've met her before and before that) who put down her crown long enough to help her kind beautiful mother bake a cake for her handsome fun dad, who was about to have a birthday.


Alas! The cupboard was bare! There wasn't a single cake mix to be found in all the castle! There was an obnoxious number of half eaten bags of potato chips and at least seven boxes of half-eaten, stale cereal, and lots of old jello....but not a single box of cake mix with which to make a birthday cake.
Despair was about to descend.... but then the kind beautiful mother had a brilliant idea! There WAS a box of brownie mix! The little princess and the kind beautiful mother immediately set about baking the brownies in round cake pans just like they would a cake...but when they turned the brownie cake out.....



Disaster! It was a disaster of huge magnitude! Pieces of brownie were everywhere!

This is the horribly distorted, quivering mass that was supposed to be the cake!

"Eeeaaaaaaeeeeeeaaaaaeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaeeekkk!"

Quickly the kind beautiful mother realized that time was of an essence. While the monster was still slightly warm she risked her dainty hands and mushed the whole thing together in a shape that was slightly reminiscent of a cake.

"I don't believe you did that! This can't possibly work! And now icing?" the little princess exclaimed!

Icing was indeed poured over the mass of chocolate goo. It ran in the cracks. It gooped down the sides!

But the brave little princess now realized that all would be well. Chocolate icing can cover a multitude of evils.

OK, not COVER exactly...but hey...this is a fairy tale...with a wave of the magic wand....

...and a few grimaces of disbelief.....

....the candles were set.....

....and the party guests appeared.....

...and all the people ate the nasty looking cake and a good time was had by all.

The End.

Moral of the story: The brownie cake is a great idea, but USE PARCHMENT PAPER!